Friday, July 6, 2012

The Cocktail Stirrer.

It would have been about 1962 or maybe 63 because I don't think I had started "real" school yet. This is a time in America that banks, stores and gas stations were all fighting for your business and they were all giving away stuff to lure you in. This is a story about one of those very prizes.

I'm not sure where they got it, but I was sure glad they did. They may have opened a new bank account or they may have got it at a gas station grand opening. It was a wonderful little silver cocktail stirrer. It was about the size and shape of a small flashlight except on the end there was what looked like a small egg beater. The whole think was only about 9 inches long.
Well neither of my parents were cocktail drinkers and it was not good for anything else and if the truth be known I bet it would not have done a very good job on your cocktail either.

Anyway you push the little silver button and the little single egg beater thing would spin like crazy if you had a fresh battery. One morning about 7:00 or so my Dad was getting ready for work. Now this was a long time before he was Ludlow Porch so he had to go to a real job. 

I remember this like it was yesterday, my Dad was standing in front of the mirror in his bathroom with just his boxers on brushing his teeth and for some reason I thought it would be a good idea to slide that cocktail stirrer up the leg of his boxers and turn it on. Let me tell you right here and now that was not a good idea! He blew toothpaste all over the mirror and let out a yell like I have never heard before. I dropped the stirrer and took off running with him right behind me up two flights of stairs and I thought he was going to kill me, by the time he got to me he was laughing so hard all he could was hug me. He held my shoulders and looked me square in the eye and said "Phil.....Don't do that again". I said "yes sir" and I never did.

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